It is sort of amazing that I wrote that when I was so young, that I felt an emptiness after my grandmothers passing and felt like no one else could fill it. But I was wrong. The jerk that I always talk about on here, that boy who I loved for a really long time and was with but treated me at times pretty badly... he was sadly the one I let into that space of my heart. I discovered this when he finally left, it was the exact same feeling when my grandmother passed away. I went through all the stages of death after that relationship because there was a death. It was me. Now, I am not a ghost typing this, but I really did die both of those nights. They changed me. But one thing that he helped me realize is that, that emptiness could be filled. So since ending that part of me, I went on a search for something I lost - myself.
I found greatness in me, that I had no idea was inside me. I even told him one day, thank you for letting me go (he hated that btw). I owe him nothing but a thank you for doing that one final thing to me. I discovered how strong I am, and beautiful. Before three years ago, if you were to say, hey you are gorgeous, I would have smiled and laughed. I never saw me, until I started putting back together all the pieces and adding new ones to my puzzle.
So anyways that is my little add in right there...
I thought it was just something important to add in.
Love,
Rachelle Star
No comments:
Post a Comment