Ugly Little Things

There are ugly little things in this world. I am writing this today because not everyone knows what is going on in anyone's life. Everything can seem perfect and wonderful but you don't see the ugly. They hid and creep around every corner and sometimes you can hid them... but most of the time you just try to get through the day without letting others see those ugly little things.

Everyone in this world has those ugly little things, so mine does not amount to much when it comes to a lot of people in this world. But they are MY ugly little things that sometimes get too heavy to bare. I smile, be positive, try to light up the world around me. I do my best to be there for others when I do not expect the same thing in return.

Then I also I have moments where I am crying in my truck and wondering why I am like this. The little ugly things will hit me like bricks that once only felt like the pitter-patter of rain. But see there is an issue there with that. I don't have a bad life. I have a pretty great one honestly. It is full of love and friends. I have a fantastic boyfriend who I share a lovely life with and home. I have my dream truck and I have a job that I do enjoy.

I am a teacher, I suffer from a few things, binge eating (eating disorder), depression, anxiety, plus anything that goes into those or are common with those type of issues - I will let you make your mind up on those ones. Sometimes people are surprised or put off by things they know about me.

"Wait... you do that?"

"Seriously? I didn't know that about you, you are so happy and vibrant."

Or it's more like...

"Oh lots of people go through that, it's okay!"

"Binge eating isn't a real eating disorder, you just like to eat."


Bashing my ugly little things does not help deal with them. They eat you alive.

Imagine you see an island in the distance. You keep swimming more and more, but the water is so cold and unfriendly. You just get so overwhelmed when a little heat front in the current comes and goes. You keep swimming because you just think that, "if I can get to that island, it will be okay." You go more and more but your legs and arms are getting tired of pushing and they are so cold and it is hard to move them. You forget that there could be tons of things under you, ready to pull you down and you might just let them because the weight of the water is just way too much. But you keep going and try your hardest to not let the water take you in, even though it would be so much easier to just let go and become one with the waves.


Even when you are mentally so-so please try to remember this. That is why I am writing this.

These are the ugly little things.